Don't you just hate spoilers? I do, too. That's why I always try to include warnings. However, I sometimes ramble a bit too much here or there and maybe a few (or many) key plot points slip without me giving proper notice. So I'd like to include a blanket spoiler warning for the weary internet travelers of the world: Here There Be Spoilers. You've been warned.

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Queen's Blade: Beautiful Warriors (Kuīnzu Bureido Utsukushiki Tōshi-tachi)

Quick warning: Queen's Blade contains material that is for mature audiences only. You've been warned. Progress at your own peril....

So there I found myself looking at my blu-ray of the six part OVA series Queen's Blade: Beautiful Warriors, thinking there's just no way that it was really that extreme. My last review of an entry in the Queen's Blade series was on the first day of this year and here this review is arriving on the final day of 2014. A lot of anime has been seen since the last time I had stepped into that world. Surely, my memory had failed me a bit. Surely, I told myself, that Queen's Blade wasn't as over-the-top as I remembered. 

My memory was not wrong at all. After five minutes of the most extreme fan service I've seen all year outside of hentai I just sort of paused and took a moment to smile. I had missed my time with the likes of Leina, Echidna, Tomoe, Airi, and all the rest. Sure, I didn't mind the revisit to the overabundance of booby scenes, but it was nice to see some characters with names I could remember. 

I watch so much anime that it really is hard to remember all of the names. Most of the time I can't. Yet I can remember a lot from this anime and this OVA only enhanced my memories of it. Yet Leina and Echidna have become a bit of a mainstay in my mental anime character catalog with the likes of Luffy and Goku. I don't understand how my brain works, either. 

Torn articles of clothing revealing nipples (because all battles have that), viscous white substances covering certain female characters (battles have that, too), and camel toe (again, perfect in a battle scene), are all the characteristics that signify Queen's Blade and at no point were the characteristics skimped on. 

There's actually a beach scene with bikinis and everything in this OVA, but I thought that was silly. Even for this show. That's always the fan service episode for most anime, but for Queen's Blade a beach setting seems almost like restraint. I mean, what are the chances of running into some sort of rapey tentacle monster on a beach? 

Damn it, I forgot all about Nyx's staff, didn't I? Well, forget I said anything. 

Dear God, what incredible fan service. It's just a thing of beauty after a while. Boobies, boobies, boobies, boobies... There is no end to it and while it probably signifies some sort of deficiency in my brain I found myself enjoying the series for the silliness that it was. 

The OVA was probably even more pointless than the previous two entries in the series, although there were definite connections that still made it seem like a fitting sequel. So I'd say it's worth splurging, so to speak, money on for the blu-ray. 

Animated boobies have never looked so good in HD before. 

Each of the six episodes were about a half hour in length and each one spent time with a different set of characters for the most part. Echidna and Elina were the focus of the first episode while the second episode featured Nowa, Alleyne, and Nyx with her rapey tentacle staff. The next two episodes featured Airi and Melona of acid-nipple fame. After that we are treated to a silly Nanael journey that again featured Airi and Melona before we end with a Tomoe and Aldra sendoff. 

That's about as plotiness as I'll get since I doubt anyone can really write too much about the plot of this short OVA without talking out of their ass. This isn't a life-changing experience or anything and it certainly won't make a best-of list, but if you like the show then this is definitely a must-see. 

Just watch out for sticky stuff. And don't ask why I have this on blu-ray. 

No comments:

Post a Comment