Don't you just hate spoilers? I do, too. That's why I always try to include warnings. However, I sometimes ramble a bit too much here or there and maybe a few (or many) key plot points slip without me giving proper notice. So I'd like to include a blanket spoiler warning for the weary internet travelers of the world: Here There Be Spoilers. You've been warned.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Losing Sucks

Like pretty much everyone I really hate losing. What was that George Patton quote? "Americans play to win at all times. I wouldn't give a hoot and hell for a man who lost and laughed." Well, that's pretty much true. I don't know how other people handle losing or how long they cling on to certain awful game memories, but for me it takes a few days to get over most losses and a lot longer to get over others. I mean, all losses are not made equal.

Let's take a look at my Indianapolis Colts this year. Currently, they are 0-9. However, only one of the losses still pisses me off. All of the others I can pretty much accept and I'm almost fine with it. The one I can't take is the 62-7 loss to the Saints. That's because the last time those two played it was in the Super Bowl. Instead of getting vengeance or even trying to look competitive the Colts made Drew Brees look like a god amongst mere mortals. It's probably one of the worst losses I've ever seen. It was so bad I stopped watching after about two quarters. I just couldn't take it.

There are other losses that really sting. Pretty much anytime the Colts lose to the Patriots is a real tough one to take. Since 2001 the Patriots lead with the series against the Colts by a total of 7-5. In the postseason the Patriots lead the Colts 2-1. All of this history and the fact that some moron decided to have these teams play against each other pretty much every year makes the Pats the team I hate most in the NFL. Which is weird, isn't it?

The Texans, Jaguars, and Titans are the ones that should be the Colts' biggest enemies. But they aren't. At least not yet. Maybe that's because until just last year the other three teams in the AFC South weren't viewed as much of a threat by most fans. It's really hard to feel intimidated when you've got Peyton Manning taking the snaps. And the only reason the other teams had a shot in 2010 was because Peyton wasn't having the best year. He was throwing too many interceptions and the Colts just weren't up to snuff. Well, it happens to everyone, right? The Colts would recover and kick butt again in 2011, right?

It wasn't until this wretched 2011 NFL season that I realized that losing really sucks. I can take all the heartbreaking playoff losses because that at least means we're in the freaking playoffs. But now everyone is talking about the Suck for Luck campaign. Sheesh, what a difference a year makes. But you know what? As bad as this year is for the Colts and as bad as the loss to the Pats will be this year there's something even worse than losing.

After watching the Alabama Crimson Tide lose to LSU 9-6 I had trouble sleeping that night. Those missed field goals were really eating at me. I just kept thinking that we should have won that game. I went to sleep pissed off Saturday night and I woke up the same way Sunday morning with the realization that my Colts were going to get their asses kicked by the Falcons. What a crummy weekend for football.

Then I read this article where this Auburn guy ranked the most memorable/horrible football losses of his life and he said how those losses helped put things in perspective. Sometimes we get too involved in sports. Way too involved. Just like the idiot Harvey Updyke that shamed all of us Bama fans when he poisoned those Auburn trees. He can take his "Roll Damn Tide" and shove it up his ass for all I care. I know some stupid Auburn fan placed a Newton jersey on the statue of the Bear, but that's no reason to kill the trees and claim it was an adequate response.

So we got to keep ourselves in check. It's okay to hate a team, but it's not okay to resort to breaking the law or even thinking about it. Chances are that if you dream of slitting Eli Manning's throat because he put a whupping on the Patriots in the Super Bowl and again in week 9 of 2011 than you need some serious help.

Sometimes we catch ourselves saying things that sound crazy to someone who hasn't been initiated into the football world. I have nothing but respect for Bill Belichick, but that doesn't mean I won't call him a ass-munching turd-burglar from time to time. It takes an immense amount of respect to earn my hatred and vice versa. If I respect a team it's because they are a great team and if I hate a team it's because they are a great team that has whupped my team's ass on more than one occasion. So saying I hate Auburn or LSU is actually a compliment to them and a begrudging admission of excellence and accomplishment.

So anytime you hear an Alabama fan say, "Fuck you, ya damn Tigers! I hope you burn in Hell ya damn sonsabitches! We'll beat the everloving dogshit out of you next year." What it really means is something like this: I really respect this team, but I sure wish we could've won. Ah, gee whiz. But it was a good game and the best team won. At least there's always next year. This same translation usually applies to Auburn fans, too.

There is this page on Facebook called Toomer's for Tuscaloosa that I proudly like because they are the ones who helped Tuscaloosa after the tornadoes. And I saw the term "Wartide" used on that page and I kind of like it. It feels weird saying it because I really don't want Auburn to win a game ever. However, I want them to be competitive that why Bama can beat them when they are at their best. So I guess I support Auburn to a degree, but I support the people that helped Tuscaloosa even more. And if Auburn were to somehow upset Bama this year than I guess it wouldn't sting as much as it did last year. It would still sting a lot, but maybe not as much. Or maybe more. I don't really know because I try not to think about it. But I would congratulate the Auburn fans anyway and listen to their crummy jokes and let them rub my nose in it for a little while (a very little while) because they know and I know that I'd do the same thing to them if and when Bama beats them. It isn't the Iron Bowl without some smack talk. Just like the Ravens/Steelers rivalry in the NFL.

And that's just the way we like it.

Anyway, I've decided that I'll make up a "loss" list of my own in the next couple of days. Then I'm going to wait maybe five years and make another. I want to see just how many of the losses that mean a lot now might not mean so much in the future.

I'm also going to make a "victory" list too. Hopefully I'll have more memorable victories than losses.

1 comment:

  1. Good idea. When you get done with your most crushing losses, I'll write about mine. Most of mine go back a little farther yours will and I've got some good ones. One of mine may involve your Crimson Tide, a game the Tide won. And as far as having more memorable victories than losses, I don't think you will. There is something about the losses that really stick with you more than the wins. I already borrowed your worst to first format for an article so I might as well borrow this to.